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Wednesday, 27 July 2016

A Day In The Life Of M.E.

I'm Wrapped in a heated blanket
Stuck on is the tens machine
Rocking a hot patch and eau du Tiger Balm
Fetching supports on both wrists and knees

My eyes sore... swollen and bloodshot 
Perfectly matching my burning flushed cheeks 
Industrial headphones and sunglasses on
Trying but failing miserably to follow the TV

Head splitting under an ice-pack
My face firmly planted in front of the fan 
It's whirling echoes my relentless reeling mind
Of the thousands of jobs... still to be done

My body's skin tinged an attractive bruised-blue 
Barely opaque... dry and insanly itchy   
I can't remember when I last felt the breeze or the warmth of the sun 
Or looked human... without the zombie-stare and hair all greasy    

My dreams taunt me with a life and friends I once had
I'm now more active in my sleep than in reality 
I've become a prisoner within my own dysfunctional body
I just want to unzip myself... step out and be free!!!

It's hard to describe what M.E. does to your soul
Even loved ones surmise you're "depressed or lazy"
Daily fighting to take back... even a little control 
Thoughts of futility and guilt... slowly sending me crazy 

I've hardly a social life worth mentioning 
As endless acute pain... has taken its toll 
My hours, days and years tick by wasted and empty 
Left today bed-bound... as again I've hit M.E.'s unyielding... brick wall!!!

© Debbie Razey 2016